Saturday, 23 September 2017 | By: Unknown

Anything For your smile

Anything for your smile

       

 She was the first one to enter the class and be seated in the front row. She was also the youngest one in the class, attentive and silent. Though I tried to interact with her in-between the class, towards the end of the session only she started speaking. 





I met her in an interactive session on Safety of Children through Prevention at one of the Government Schools in Greater Noida. Nowadays, at most of the places in India, children studying at Government Schools are generally from lower economic background. Though we proudly acknowledge that India is a land of diversity, the economic strata has clearly demarcated India into two parts: one part is affluent India and the other part is marginalised India. And thus it becomes a real challenge for any change makers to address one issue with one frame-work that works for all.

 

Nobel Peace Laureate Kailash Satyarthi's call for Bharat Yatra to take pledge to make India safe for children and recent horrific incidents at schools triggered a wave of information circulation in press media and social media regarding the issues of safety of children.

 

However, safety has a different connotation for the children of Government Schools. Children walk down to the school on their own. Nobody would come to drop them or pick them up from the school. There is no school bus, no driver, no conductor and no security guard to look after their safety. As if these children are born with a destiny tuned skill to rough it up. From a very young age, as young as five/six years, they need to learn to be confident while walking on the street, they have no alternative but to learn in a classroom even without a fan in the summer of June. Still, children at Government Schools, generally feel happy to be at the school. One of the reasons behind their happiness is that it gives them enough space to play and be with friends. In case of abuse of any kind, if any, common scenario is that the child simply drops out of the school and after sometime parents would migrate to another location.

 

Life of these little ones outside the school is tough and full of challenges. From a very young age, as small as seven years, they learn to clean the house, cook and serve food for their younger siblings. They need to learn to keep themselves safe from drug addict, alcoholic neighbors in absence of their parents and elders at home. Most of the children's parents work as labourer, they leave home early and return late in the evening. Children have no option but to learn to grow on their own. For these little ones, question of survival is more important than their safety. They learn early in life meaning of good touch and bad touch from the neighborhood environment, but then they also learn to remain silent.

 

Children from this part of India have to fight everyday battle for their survival and safety. They grow up fighting everyday against the abuses of addicted people, jobless & idle neighborhood women and youth. They try to learn to stay safe from the traps of people whose livelihood option is trafficking. They learn to identify and stay away from people with unattended mental health issues who could abuse, assault and harm a child at any point of time. For these children, their poverty is a big threat to their safety.

 

Recently initiated preventive measures by schools and state administration on policy guidelines for safety of children at schools, Radio Frequency Identification Card for students, awareness amongst parents and children through posters, stories and pictures on good –touch, bad –touch, circular by schools on CCTV coverage and declaring the school as 'no touch' zone  etc. will certainly bring intended positive outcomes at the schools.  Bharat Yatra has already received huge response and successfully creating mass awareness.

 

While safety of each and every child is our responsibility, it is also important to ensure that they grow healthy, both physically and mentally.  The children must not receive a message from us that the world is not safe for them.  May be some of us will need to be trained on how to share safety information with children, may be some of us will take sabbatical and spend more time with the little ones, may be some of us will get back to the joint family to ensure that they are at the safe hands and may be some of us will be more visible at the neighbourhood community to make our presence felt to any such elements who might intend to harm a child, as a whole, the onus is on us to ensure that these little ones grow up as confident women/men wearing that million dollar smile always…!   

Wednesday, 9 August 2017 | By: Unknown

Morning Mourns..!

Morning Mourns…..!

 

All the positivity of life begins with a beautiful beginning in the morning. Reading a Newspaper with a cup of green tea first thing in the morning, adds on to this positivity. The Newspaper would have all types of news… informative, educational, business oriented, prosperity and current happenings….which would embolden the reader to go through all types of emotions. Some news make us happy for the day and some ignite thoughts to nurture.

 

One such front page news in yesterday's paper was about a man killing his two daughters in a brutal way. I read the news in detail and stopped with that. But then, another similar news in today's paper made me to think about the incidents from a different perspective.

 

Let's have a relook at the news:

 

Aug 07 2017 : The Times of India (Delhi)

Dad kills his 2 daughters over wife's `affair'

A 35-year-old man who suspected his wife of cheating killed his two young daughters at their house in Gurgaon's New Palam Vihar on Saturday night. Mukesh Yadav struck his daughters -Pooja (3) and Neha (5) -with a brick. He hit Pooja on the head after having tried to slit her throat with a knife, while he strangled Neha after thrashing her with the brick, reports Gayas Eapen.

Mukesh killed the girls when his wife had apparently gone to a police station with their two sons to complain against her husband's violence. Mukesh later called the cops himself and, after being arrested, confessed to the crime. http://epaperbeta.timesofindia.com/index.aspx?EID=31808&dt=20170807

 

Aug 08 2017 : The Times of India (Delhi)

Man crushes wife's head with cylinder as kids look on

An unemployed man staying with his in-laws in southeast Delhi's Badarpur area stabbed his wife multiple times with a kitchen knife, slit her throat and then crushed her head with a gas cylinder in a fit of rage after she refused to leave her parents' house and stay with him in a rented flat nearby. The couple's two children -brothers four and 10 years old -were witness to the horrific murder. http://epaperbeta.timesofindia.com/index.aspx?eid=31808&dt=20170808

 

Let's analyse the news:

In both the cases, wives had a mind of their own and they were capable of taking decisions.

In the first case, wife had some awareness about her legal rights. To ascertain her rights she decided to go to the Police station.

In the second case, wife decided not to go to a rented accommodation with her unemployed husband.  

At both the cases, husbands were swayed by extreme power of anger and ended up being the gruesome murderer of their dear one's.

Such an act of anger does not happen in a sudden fit of rage…there has to be earlier episodes of frequent fights between the couple and aggravated physical violence with each episode … then only such a stage comes when a person could get into such a fit of rage.

 

Suggested Solutions:

There could be many reasons to such sudden gruesome action. A clinical psychologist and/or a psychiatrist would be the right persons to analyse such reasons.

But my understanding from common people's point of view, the need of the day is to create awareness about mental health and certain common symptoms of identifying mental health issues in self and others. Our mind is the most powerful part of our body that rules our life…and for the majority of us, we take least care to nurture our beautiful minds as healthy minds.

In a hypothetical situation, as the wives of the above cases were capable of taking decisions, some awareness about mental health issues would have helped them to go to professional counsellors and take proper guidance to treat and improve upon the mental health of the husbands and thereby they could have saved the family.   

The solutions would not end here: the four young boys (two sons in the first case who went with their mother to police station, two sons in the second case who were present on the spot), who witnessed the violence and its outcome will need immediate counselling and professional intervention to help them overcome the trauma and see the world from a new perspective of love, care and trust.  

Hope for a new beginning, a new dawn and no more morning mourns. 

Saturday, 31 December 2016 | By: Unknown

My take away from 2016

My take away from 2016

 

Waking up on an early foggy morning is rare for me, but somehow, it happened. And then I tried a forceful sleep, which was like, awake when you were asleep. At that point my thoughts had the freedom to go haywire …. but it had a practical approach…and whispered silently…hello… today is the last day of the year ! The whisper made me alert …end of a year…wow…all those minutes, seconds and hours gone..!!

 

The calculation started automatically, what did I do throughout the year? Honestly, I could recall only yesterday, nothing beyond, it was almost blank. I immediately jumped out of the bed, opened up the laptop....to my surprise, a soothing vibration of music started, "Spirit of India" by Ravi Shankar…so powerful music, could  take you to a different world altogether…and good for me, memoirs would sure to revive..!

 

·        My new year started at Ranthombore, amidst the beauty of nature…and the whole purpose of visit was fulfilled at the amazing sight of a tigress and cub playing and petting…yes..once in a lifetime kind of experience..!

·        Visited home twice…to spend some time with Ma & Dewta (my father). For me, my home is still the place where my parents are…they are ageing, ailing, still they are there to hold my hand....I am blessed.

·        Jethai (Ma's elder sister), whom we met in September passed away in November at the age of 86…she was beautiful and happy with life.

·        First time I witnessed the final journey of a friend, Protima…returned sad and wise…actually understood the difference between a body with a soul and a body without a soul..!

·        I remembered few occasions when I had a hearty laugh with friends

·        I never wanted to recall any such situation that made me upset and tried to heal myself by ignoring the whole situation

·         I remembered the most thoughtful discussion I had with a Uber Cab driver Ravi during my fifteen minutes ride in the car. Ravi commented with authority of his real time experiences that:

" Education is for two sets of people…one who has money and the other who has brain…for the rest it has no meaning". According to him, so called degree holders are basically illiterate, because they can never guide anyone on how to survive, whereas he, a class VII dropout has learnt so much from life, that he had actually shown path of survival to many.!" Ravi wishes to give the best of everything to his three months old daughter 'Mitika'….and he is working hard to make that possible.

·        I could not forget that nine year old "Nisha", who was so proud to say that she did cleaning of the house, washed utensils, cooked food and served to her brothers….and I would not ignore her brother, eleven year old "Sanju", who used all his authority on her to ensure that she remained disciplined and learnt to behave like a girl.   

·        I wish to move ahead to 2017, with a dream for Nisha , Sanju, and many more wise learned person like Ravi ….. hope our dreams complement each other and we create a wonderful place for all of us..!!  

·        At the end of the year, it is good to see the smiling face of "Roopkumari", thora to taklif hua hai, par accha hai woh bhi humare barabar ho jayenge"…. It's becoming slightly tough for us but good that we all will be equal now….!

 

A dream that assimilates in thoughts…!

 

Wish you all  a Very Happy New Year  

 

Love Life..!